July 29, 2012- afternoon, 4pm

    Well, we did go to church this morning, and Sunday School too! At West New Home Baptist.

    I was sitting outside this morning, drinking my coffee, and got to thinking about church, and that there would be a man of God, a chosen leader of the Lord at church, and God had given him something to say, and that it could help us and instruct us on which ways to go, and I immediately did not want to miss it.

    I checked the time, and it was 8:50am, and immediately got Brian up, cause we were going to Sunday School too, cause there could be a message there for us too.

    We got dressed, and showed up just in time for Sunday School. There was a meeting first thing in the main congregation, and we joined, and I immediately felt the Spirit of the Lord, and worshiped while we sang.

    A nice man got up and gave a quick devotional, about prosperity, and that when that happens, to beware, because most forget about God. And that was exactly why I was there, to not forget about my God, Lord, and Savior, Jesus Christ, whom I love so dearly.

    We made our way to the Sunday School rooms, and we sat down, and read our lessons, and I was really looking hard for a lesson. It was on selfish ambition, and I immediately began to wonder if this blog was selfish ambition. I shared with the group the wonderful things that had been happening on Facebook with my friends and how supportive and what a blessing they have all been to me here lately, and I just began to wonder if maybe this blog was my selfish ambition.

    We adjourned for church, and I met Brian in the congregation, and he said he had a wonderful Sunday School as well, and they had the same lesson.

    We began singing, and I began worshipping, and my thoughts wondered towards not so savory thoughts, and I felt the Spirit had been quenched, and I tried and tried my best, and worshipped the best I could for the rest of the singing. The devil does things like that. I must not be as strong as I thought.

    The preacher, though I do not know his name, got up to preach. I was very skeptical of him at first, but towards the end of the service somewhere, my heart changed. He began preaching very sincerely, and his message was so heartfelt. I knew within a moment's time, that this was a man I could follow, that he was truly ordained by God himself, called to minister to all of us at West New Home this Sunday Morning, and I hope he become s the new preacher there.

    We made our way out the doors this Sunday morning, and I was so starving. We had to go home first, cause I had to use the ladies, and I didn't even realize it until we got in the car. That's crazy to think the Lord would hold my bladder.

    Brian and me decided on Subway, and took the backroads all the way to Rayville. We made it there, and I was so hungry, I ordered a footlong without even thinking about it. I was thinking, maybe 700 calories. That was before chips, and Brian got two chocolate chip cookies, which I also indulged in about 3 bites. We did get a Diet Coke, no calories, but all in total I'd say we had 1100 calories in that one meal, and we ate carbs.

    I was so fed up with myself when we left there, all I wanted to do was go to sleep. The thought crossed my mind to throw up, but I held that back, cause I am NOT going to end up bulimic with some kind of eating disorder. That is the most unhealthy thing I have ever heard of. I ate the stuff myself, so I'll just have to live with it for today.

    We were supposed to go to Walmart, but neither one of us was feeling too good after eating those 1100 calories, (from SUBWAY), man what a crock. So we left and we went home.

    As soon as I got home, I went straight to bed. And here I am now, just waking up.

    We've still got some veges from last night on the stove, so I guess we'll eat those for dinner tonight, although I am so far from hungry, I am just sick about lunch. How could I eat those carbs? Why would I do such a thing? Which reminds me, I'm going to have to burn off some of that mess today, by walking, and I need to get in there and do it soon, cause I'm going to lose my gusto if I don't.

    On the way to Subway, I began to tell Brian of my concerns about this blog. I told him, I hope this is not my selfish ambition, although it is selfish, although it is just who I am, a writer, who has always written, and will probably always write!

    I began explaining to him my heart, that I know that I am strong in the Lord, but that people believe me to be strong in the Lord, and that I know that shouldn't make a difference, but it did, but it didn't, but it shouldn't! I told Brian, it just seems that the more I talk about the Lord, the more popular I get! That I don't want to use the Lord for popularity. Following the Lord is just who I've been for the last 10 years! And if it came to being popular and no Lord, I'd chose no popularity, because I cannot and do not want to do without the Lord. Brian said people like me for various reasons, and I felt that all of that was the Lord's doings as well. He created me, and made me completely who I am. All the Glory be to God Almighty. Brian insists I take some credit, but honestly I just feel that these blessings come from God and God alone.

    So I realized that's where my heart was, and not that this blog is selfish ambition, that's not where my lesson was. The selfish ambition that I was to beware of, was to try to be popular without my Lord. And that's exactly why I'm going to church, and reading my Bible, because I am bewaring, and that is the last thing I want to do.

    All Glory be to God in the Highest, Who Reigns Forever and Ever, Who is Everlasting and Eternal, Who Is and Was and Is to Come!